Recently Peaches had a change of heart, she suddenly decided she wanted a new baby! She’s okay with either a baby sister or a baby brother and has been asking Papa Jesus to put a baby on Mommy’s tummy for a week now. It’s funny and cute but when reality sinks in, I can’t help but feel scared out of my wits when I think of having a new baby. First because I don’t think my weight is ideal for pregnancy, second I worry on our financial status, third am I sane enough to tend to another baby?
Everyone seems to be ready for a new addition to the family, except me! So this post is probably dedicated to myself more than anyone else teeheee…
Preparing the home for a new baby
Babies don’t do much for the first few months of life except eat, sleep, cry and poop. So the basic would be to prepare the needs such as:
1. Decide if you’re going to practice attachment parenting or crib all the way. Free up a space in your room for the crib and the baby’s other stuff such as cabinets, diaper changing station, etc
2. Decide the baby’s feeding pattern- are you going for breastfeeding or formula? Best to talk to your OB-Gyne and Pediatrician about this so it would be clear to all parties on what to do.
3. Decide on diapers- are you going for the organic or the normal diapers?
Children of certain age reacts differently on big changes such as a new addition to the family. For children aged 2-4 years old, it’s normal that they’re clingy and would not understand the concept of sharing you to another baby. Here’s what you can do to help the child understand the concept of being an older sibling:
1. Be honest- explain to the child that the baby is a gift from God and just like him/her. Though the baby will be cute and cuddly, it will also be crying and will take a lot of Mommy’s care and attention. Reassure your child that he/she is loved equally as the new baby.
2. Let the child participate and contribute- this should be the most effective way to help the child understand. Bring the child to your check ups and to your ultra sounds and show “pictures” of the baby inside your tummy. Have bonding moments with your child like when you’re putting headphones on your tummy, let the older sibling take the other end of the earphone. Bring the child with you when you shop for the new baby and let him/her choose things for her new baby brother or sister!
3. Start calling her Ate or him Kuya- this way you instill that he has authority over the little brother or sister. But explain that it will take a while before he/she can actually take care of the baby.
4. It’s bonding time with Dad- ask your husband to spend more time with your older child and “contribute” on explaining the concept of having an addition to the family.
Preparing the extended family for a new baby:
Babies bring families together and it’s normal that grandparents could become so wrapped up with the new baby that the older child feels neglected. Here are few tips to make it easier for everyone:
1. Discuss with your parents and parents in law that they should also spend time with the older child when they come to visit the new baby. They should not break the routine that has been set for the older child. It’s also best if they spend time with the older child without the new baby.
2. Set days and times when the grandparents can visit you and the baby so you will have time to rest and do other things. It’s also equally possible that they worry about you wanting their involvement on the new baby so it’s best if you initiate on setting dates.
Honestly, I feel like there really isn’t a bible for parenting or the milestones you take as a family. It’s how you take it and with whom. We don’t plan to add another child until next year but as early as today, we’re preparing for it and we welcome whatever is for us. I hope you all learned something from my post and I will ever be so grateful if you can add more.
My forever baby girl, Peaches at the hospital December 27, 2007