What do you do when you feel stuck?
How do I get out of this rut?
These questions are often heard from stressed out friends, colleagues and even family members. May we be employed, entrepreneurs, students, parents or whatever… we always ask these same questions at some point.
When a friend asked me this question today, I didn’t know what to say. Not because I don’t know the answer but because I realized, I never felt stuck for too long to a point that I don’t know how to get out of being stuck.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying I am better than anyone else who feel stuck.
I guess it’s because I have this mindset that anything negative can be expelled and turned to positive energy.
I can easily process emotions and deal with it faster than most people. This has helped me become a “strong” shoulder to cry on to many of my friends and family. I can think under heavy pressure too which has been proven helpful countless of times.
But why do we get stuck? Or feel stuck in a rut?
I think it’s natural to feel stuck at some point in your life. I even feel it once or twice a year!
It’s that time when there’s nothing much happening in your life and you’re used to being “active” with whatever that keeps you busy. It’s your brain telling you, you need to stop…rest and think.
It’s pretty normal, common and okay. Yes, it’s okay to feel stuck! Some people feel stuck for a day, a week, a month or even a year. What’s important is how you deal with it and the result of that.
So, how do you deal with the feeling of being stuck in life?
Feel it and don’t resist it. As I told you before, being stuck is a wake up call that something’s not right. Is it because you’re dealing with too much stress that you need to stop, rest and re-think your play? Then do precisely that. Stop. Rest and Rethink.
If you resist, you add up to that negative emotion building up inside you and sooner or later it’s going to blow up and by then it might be twice or thrice as hard to pacify and correct.
When you stop resisting, you are able to think more and organize the thoughts in your head.
Be in a quite place. You know when people are stressed out and you say, “take a walk” or “magpahangin ka muna”. That’s exactly it. Go out, walk and clear your mind. A change of scenery will do you good. A quiet place lets you listen to the noise in your head without dealing with the outside noise that you hear. It’s less overwhelming this way.
And when you truly listen, it’s the time you actually hear yourself. You could have the AHA moment right here.
One good practice I always do that really helps is, I take a 20 minute break from whatever I’m doing or when I’m about to do massive thinking and decision making. I just sit, people watch or close my eyes. It’s when my mind’s free from whatever I stopped working on…. is the time I actually process ideas and thoughts.
Hey, have you experienced having the best ideas while you’re in the loo or taking a bath? If you did (high five amiga!), well it’s because at that moment… you’re in a peaceful and restful state! Most of my business ideas are actually from these moments, no doubt about that.
Go back to where and why you started. Why did you start becoming who you are now or where you are now? Going back to basics will remind you of your intentions, of your goals. Sometimes, we find out that we’re way past our initial goals and there’s nothing more we can do… that’s why we feel stuck…we feel like we’re facing a wall.
So then you’ll realize you need to back away a little from that wall and see the bigger picture. See where you stand now and where you can stand in the future.
If you realize these, things will slowly take form and fall into places.
What’s the worst that could happen? Ask that. I learned this from my husband when he was egging me to jump start a business and I was thinking too much and kept on delaying things. It’s the perfect question… when you feel scared thinking about doing something different… something risky.
If you’re in a situation that feels like quick sand’s up your waist, it’s time to grab on to something and pull yourself up. If not, scream your lungs out for help.
That’s my next advice…
Seek help from sensible friends, successful mentors, or positive people. Sometimes being around these kind of people is enough to make you want to get going. Your mind filled with ideas along side these great people with positive energies.
You know you’re filled with positive energy when you feel validated, when you feel light and finally determined.
So, to stand strong once again… find your support. Even century old trees are heavily supported by deep seated roots and what-not.